Items of Note

"Sure Jesus could restore my physical and spiritual virginity, especially if I lost it to some rapist, but who wants that? I'm saving myself for marriage, and I'll use force if necessary." -Hilary Faye

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Drama galore

So I am working on getting myself fired apparently with a barrage of stupid errors in my monthly reporting.

Being unemployed will open up all sorts of free time for my blogging projects.

Yeah me.

It could be worse – one of my coworkers made a $44M mistake in her reporting that slipped by about 5 levels before it got to the CFO. Both of mine were under $200k.

OMG – I suck. Since when do I make mistakes? Perhaps it is the 12 hour days I have been working. Perhaps it is because I simply don’t care at this point.

What makes it worse is that just yesterday my boss sent an email to his boss to commend my work, and his boss in turn sent one to the CFO who sent me a note just this morning thanking me for my ‘excellent’ contributions. Yeah- I bet she’s not so happy with me now.

So this afternoon we are having one of those silly team building outings- apparently bowling is the answer to all of our work woes. At least we get to drink. I am all about the drinking today. Perhaps I can pick up an up an application at the bowling alley while we are there. I’m sure polishing balls there pays as much as an accounting gig, right?!?!?!

Hah – ball polisher- that sounds like a good job for me indeed.

Maybe I can become a drug dealer – everybody always tells me that I look so sweet and innocent, I bet I could pull it off. The fact that one of my neighbors at my new apartment is a police officer shouldn’t be a problem, right? Maybe he can find me some good suppliers.

Now I’m just talking crazy. That’s what having a high pressure job gets me- slipping into gibberish land.

Let us top all of this off with my horoscope:
A new look will take you far. Focus on shifting one or two areas of your appearance for maximum impact with minimum sacrifice and risk. Avoid going too far or taking fashion risks, but ditch a conventional look for the time being. This is a fiery day in the zodiac as the Moon, Mercury and Venus all move into fire signs in the early a.m. By Sunrise, Mercury and Venus will be in Leo, creating lots of drama, and the Moon will be in Aries, giving love a head start to this frenzy.

See I am wearing braided pigtails today due to the impending outing – and now I get to go sit in front of the CFO in them. Would one say that is ‘going too far?’ If it was a man I would say no.... Drama not good.


We shall see what happens. If you see a PayPal link go up you will know I am in trouble for real. :)



At 10:36 AM, Blogger Polly Prissy-Pants said...

Oh I'm sure you'll be fine. People misplace millions of dollars everyday in your line of work, no?

At 11:09 AM, Blogger Other Brother said...

Working at the bowling alley was the coolest job I ever had, but the money is no good. Not at all.
Maybe we could open a bowling alley/stripclub/bar/putt-putt course/casino.
Y'know, something for the whole family.

At 4:30 PM, Blogger katarina said...

I hate those "Office outings". Like I don't spend enough time with those people. My office won't pay you if you don't come. What a great way to force me to spend time with people I see more than my own family.

I would TOTALLY come to the bowling alley/stripclub/bar/putt-putt course/casino!! It's like a one-stop-shop! I could bring the office!

At 7:53 PM, Blogger A. Estella Sassypants said...

Put a XXX bookstore in, too. Gotta kiss up to the booknerds such as myself.

At 7:59 PM, Blogger ago-go said...

braided pigtails are good any day of the week in my books!

At 7:27 AM, Blogger Princess Steph said...

Polly - true.... One time when I worked for Sprint I misplaced $60M and NOBODY NOTICED (I eventually found it!)

Other - Sounds like a fine idea - you provide the upfront capital and I am on board!!

Katrina- it wasnt as bad as i thought it would be. i like MOST of the people i work with....

Andi- but of course!

Go-go- I KNOW!!!! My hair is long enough that they look great. Bastards.


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