Items of Note

"Sure Jesus could restore my physical and spiritual virginity, especially if I lost it to some rapist, but who wants that? I'm saving myself for marriage, and I'll use force if necessary." -Hilary Faye

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

So very me....

Wildly inappropriate comments that spewed forth from my mouth at happy hour last night:

“Well I would have fucked him anyway” – said as the waiter Al was walking by (of course I wasn’t paying attention.) He stopped, turned around and came back to the table and asked me if I would come to happy hour there every day. It’s been a long time since I have blushed so much. I fully expected to see his phone number on my credit card receipt.

“I simply couldn’t take the old man shirts, you know- the short sleeved ones that button up. Who in the world wears those?!?!?” - shouted loudly due to the volume of the music. You know who in the world wears them? The table of guys sitting next to us, that’s who. The looked distressed at the news that they were wearing old man shirts. Somebody had to tell them, but the sad part is I wasn’t even talking about them.

Last night was odd to say the least. Apparently even with my foot in my mouth all night the elderly crowd still found me attractive. At one point my co-workers threatened to beat down a table because two guys kept leaning back in their chairs directly behind me. Either I smelled really good and they kept wanting a whiff, or they were getting their picture taken with the back of my head. Creepy. One of them was wearing a sweat band on his head. Once again I ask ‘who in the world wears those???’ The sad part is I saw him in there last Thursday and he had a different sweat band on his head- apparently he has a collection. My coworker called me before I got there last night and said that I would never believe who was back. Of course I knew who she was talking about – I haven’t seen one of those things in like 15 years. Dead sexy.

I got some excellent work news at happy hour – cha-ching!!! Apparently I have been a very good girl.

I got home and took the puppy for a long walk and got a call from Non-IT boy. He was super charming and managed to make me feel bad about not calling him back. He gave me a hard time about not calling and it worked folks – the world has gone mad. I might have to watch this one. We have a real-live fancy date scheduled for Thursday. It’s been a while since I’ve been on a fancy date- I’m looking forward to it.

All in all it turned out to be a stellar night. Except for that dream I had about a killer baby. That was bad bad bad.

I guess I had better go try to earn my keep around here. Be good!


At 8:14 AM, Blogger petrow said...

Hey hey , glad to see you can put your foot in your mouth , were gonna get aqlong just fine, plus i like bendy girls , they make for good fun , hahahaha, glad to hear you had a good time , finde me on mSN sexy.

At 11:00 AM, Blogger Polly Prissy-Pants said...

I know where you are coming from with the killer baby dream. I have had those too.

Old man shirts - totally. Gross.

At 1:32 PM, Blogger Princess Steph said...

ummmm- where the hell are all of my comments?


Is nobdy even gonna call me a whore today?

At 1:51 PM, Blogger The Funky Bee said...


At 1:52 PM, Blogger The Funky Bee said...

No seriously, I was going to say that I am very excited for your fancy pants date! I knew this was gonna get interesting!

At 2:37 PM, Blogger Storm said...

I'm still trying to figure out why there was someone in there with a sweat band on. WHY???

At 5:28 PM, Blogger yournamehere said...

I may own old man shirts. Thanks for making me cry.

At 7:50 PM, Blogger A. Estella Sassypants said...

Fancy date, fancy date!!! Have fun. Take pics on the sly.

At 8:58 PM, Blogger ago-go said...

where ya goin' on the fancy date? where where where where where? somewhere you get to dress up and order wine by the bottle i hope!

At 4:28 AM, Blogger katarina said...

Yay! Fancy date!!

At 7:07 AM, Blogger AMS said...

at least you get a free dinner - even if he is a fanny oops i mean nanny

At 7:22 AM, Blogger Princess Steph said...

funky- thank you- i fully anticipated that response!

storm - i have no idea - if I ever see him again im gonna rip it off of his head. maybe he lost a bet?

your- please, please tell me that aren't plaid? please....

Andi- i shall try!

Go-go - fancy dinner at a steakhouse and then who knows - it's up to me!!! he said anywhere i want to go. A skirt is in order - Nordstrom here I come on my lunch hour!!

kat- yeah!!! its been too long!

ams - no doubt!


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