Weeeeeee----- it's Friday!

The trip has been booked, I will be visiting Vancouver the week after Thanksgiving.

This is me being very excited. :) No, really I am. It's not exactly the Swiss Alps initially planned, but it will work!

I got sleep last night people, sleep. What a wonderful thing.

The best part was the nocturnal visitor (Paul) at 1 am. Sleep, sexy scorching hot booty call, sleep. Life is good.

In other news, I am going to have to have a little talk with Damien (the 21 YO.) He is a little high maintenance for someone I just met.

Y'all have a great weekend.

No HNT here (maybe later)

I don't feel like posting for HNT, sorry.

You know what happens when you are EB and make plans with me at 4 pm and then don't answer your phone at 7 pm when I call to say I'm coming over? You get replaced by Paul. You have to watch that Paul, he's a sneaky one.

I was even planning on staying the night, he was going to get his second chance. I shaved my legs. Again. I shaved my legs.

So Paul and I spent the night bar hopping in a city that was half dark due to the freak storm we had. So much fun. There was some excellent candid conversation- he now knows stuff that even Pixel herself hasn't heard (but she will now.) I can tell you about his family, his ambitions, what he had for dinner on Tuesday and about the time he broke a man’s arm on purpose.

Oh, and I found myself reiterating to the man that I obviously like how much I wasn't looking for anything beyond friendship. Because I'm a blithering idiot. We all know this.

He says I have a lot of rules. He likes it. I like him, herein lies the problem.

We will wait and see what happens. He have a date for sex tonight (after our plans Pixel, I’m not bailing.)

The 21 year old called me back last night the second I got home, he wanted to ‘hang out’ and watch me get ready for my date. I politely declined, I hope he doesn’t start calling me every day.

I had a conversation with Cuban Boy telling him that there was to be no more sex and that EB (who for all Cuban Boy knows is now my boyfriend) doesn’t want me to hang out with other guys. You should stop calling, I said it. I give him a week.

The whole complex (the other realm) knows about was is being referred to as the ‘drinking party’ and wants to know why they weren’t invited. I am going to attempt to spend the weekend at my mom’s house, let things blow over.

I was awake at 6 am, which sucks because I went to bed at 3.

One of these nights I’m going to need to get some sleep.

Chatty

I know, I'm very chatty today.

I received a call from Cuban Boy this afternoon that almost made me drop the phone - some things are not meant to be said over the phone. Think sexual. I told him to call me back tonight. I am going to tell him I am serious with EB and that I can't see him 'like that' anymore.

I also received a call from Damien from last night. I have a 21 YO calling me asking what time I will be home from work. This is very intersting. I need to not drink with the boys anymore, this is the conclusion I have come to. Under normal circumstances I would never have given my number to such a young thing (ok, probably not.)

He told me that Marcus and his girl (one of the angry knocks from last night) broke up over his being over at my house last night. The funny thing is HE was pretty much behaving.

I am planning on sleeping at EB's tonight I think, I don't want to cause any more trouble at my house.

I was hoping for a drama-free week. So much for that. I might spend the weekend at Mom's. I don't have a good feeling about this Marcus thing. How do you tell someone "I'm sorry I don't want your man, he doesn't make enough money?"

Fun with email (it's been a while, come on, play along)

Yo freak-

The woman that sits on the other side of the wall has a Jersey accent and kisses into the phone like every 10 minutes. She loves a lot of people, because she says it every five minutes. I have been sitting here for 2 days and I already know that she is having trouble getting DSL installed, but she's getting a heck of a deal for her trouble, and one of her adult kids is traveling a lot these days. She drives me crazy. If you hear about 'an incident' at my building it wasn't me. Please send bail money, though.

See, this is why I had that nice office all by my lonesome when I had my old job. There were reasons.

I might actually vomit at some point this afternoon, too much Crown is not a good thing. Never get into a drinking contest with a man that is almost 7 feet tall, that is my sage advise for the day. Also, never get involved in a land war in Asia, but you already knew that.

I have had 2 run-ins with the cute guy from the 25th floor in the last day, both times he has been with clients/co-workers, but has been very complimentary and chatty. Next time I am asking him for his card: I am going to ask a guy out, I have never done that to the best of my knowledge (I shirk all responsibility for actions I might have taken in the past while intoxicated.) He is very nice, drives a nice car, dresses well, has a job; all pluses in my book. We can date, he can like me, then I can force him away at the first sign of commitment and be a total weirdo. It should be fun. I'll print him up a t-shirt, I survived hurricane Stephanie, or perhaps something clever instead.

There was more but I deleted my diatribe on old people in Sebring convertibles because I knew you wouldn't read it.

That is all. This not being able to talk on the phone much may not be a good thing for your productivity.

Bye now.

EDIT- Response:

My producivity, schomidivity. Wait, didn't I just say I was going to re-dedicate myself to work. Ah well, I'll start Monday. Maybe I'll diet and excercise as well. BTW, when can I go home today?

Ask the guy out. Live dangerously. Life on the edge, and all that. I just read about a 105-year-old-woman. She would ask him out. Are you 106, hmmm? Although I am totally on board with the t-shirt idea. We need something clever, but then we could give them out instead of not calling or having to directly break it off. Think of the conversations it would save!

In my rather lengthy experience, the only way to compete with a 7-foot-tall man is to cheat. Cheat. And Cheat some more. Don't even try to hide it by the time he is drunk. You must accept that playing by the rules means you can't win. Therefore, forget the rules. Water=tequila. Short shots. Other tricks may be to advanced for you (was that a shot at me? new rules, while taking shots at me you must use proper grammar. I know the advanced tricks - nevermind.)

I never did trust New Jersery. It always just seemed like a part of New York that was going through a rebellious phase. Stupid teenagers. But now you understand why I got so excited about that machine that makes it so other people can't hear your phone calls. (I have no idea what they hell she is talking about.)

For continuity purposes, feel free to post. But not the last sentence, cause that is lame. Or that sentence. Or that sentence. Oh hell, forget it. (see, Pixel is a freak I tell you.)

Oh Boy(s)

Last night was out of control. Literally.

I probably should have just gone out, but no, I wanted to save money so I let Tall Boy and G come over to hang out. We drank an entire bottle of Crown, then finished off two partial bottles of Kettle One. That was all fine and well - G even gave us some time to go into my room and 'be alone.'

Then Marcus came over.

Then some 21 yo named Damien.

Number of people who saw my breasts last night: 4 (a lost bet and it was quick)
Number of angry women who knocked on my door looking for their men: 2
Number of people who asked me to have sex: 4
Number of people I had sex with: 1
Number of penis' that were shown: 3 (again a bet, and oh boy!)
Number of 21 YO's who told me they didn't have a girlfriend that lives 3 doors down but lied: 1

Yeah, so it was interesting. I was really grateful to see that my car was still intact this morning.

My house is a wreck; the coffee table and floor is littered with shot glasses and empty booze bottles and there is a very nice imprint of my make up on my bathroom mirror.

One hell of a Tuesday night.

In other news, I learned that the guy that moved in next door to me is a Dallas Police officer - good to know. That makes two law enforcement officers in my building. Nice.

That's going to make it harder to keep up the title of 'funnest apartment in the complex,' although last night pretty much sealed that fate.

Before all of the madness started I called Pixel to confess what a true freak I am. I told her how I called EB and told him I already had plans last night even though he offered to cook dinner for me again last night, and how stupid I felt over Paul introducing me as his fiancee last week while we were out. By stupid I mean I got all googly inside. I am NOT supposed to 'like' this guy - we had an agreement.

Here is a quick and dirty snapshot of my living room this morning. What you may not be able to see are the two clear bottles on the floor. You will notice that we resorted to buttery nipple shots, you know it't bad when you break out the last resort liquor.

Y'all have fun.

I knew

It was going to be bad. For some reason I knew.

That's why I have been making excuses for the past 2 months. I'm sick, yes it's that time again, I'm too busy......

I was right.

Excellent foreplay, but we all know that's not what I'm interested in.

He made me a three course dinner, there was wine, candles and some guy named Jacob for a bit who is a cage fighter - anyway. The bed was made people - things were planned.










So as you can see the man made an effort.

Then he couldn't stay hard.

Now I know it's not me- nobody has ever had this problem in the past. You don't have to tell me it's not me. I know.

How is it that I knew going in to this that it wouldn't be good? Next time I shall pay attention to my instincts.

This is a very interesting article about New Orleans

Hello, Death? It's me.....

I am back, but I am still sick.

I spent so much time in bed over the weekend it's a wonder my skin didn't graft to the sheets- or did it? Yuck.

Anywho, me thinks it might be time to go t0 the doctor - my having to go an entire weekend without going out is serious business my friends. Serious business indeed.

The sweet boys that live in my apartments were kind enough to still offer to hang out with me even though it was obvious I was lifting a weak hand to knock at death's door.... now that's dedication to getting some pussy don't you think? I politely declined. They were knocking at my door again last night at 10 pm, fuckers.

So here I am - day one of the new job, hopped up on Sudafed cold and cough. Wish me luck.

Oh, and my house is fine- no damage here.

Y'all be good.

PS-

I found this in my comments:

Anonymous said...
Been following your posts... We are one in the same... My father does walk on water and all girls are dime a dozen! I understand you have been hurt so have I..hell I am 36 yrs old and a goodlooking MF... call me now.... 214-914-1495 my name is Gil

I'm not trying to be mean, but damn. It is never, ever a good idea to put your number anywhere near my blog (I am not encouraging y'all to call it) I'm just saying, I think I have enough on my plate without meeting random guys from the internets ;)

Gil, sweetheart, if you have the courage to approach me at the bar then maybe we can talk, but until then stick to Yahoo personals to meet your online honeys.

Bah

Still sick, still need provisions from wishlist.

That IPod would sure make me feel better.

;)

Big weekend plans = stay indoors with dog who is scared of storms and get lots of rest. I might have EB over, one never knows.

Y'all have a good weekend and pray that the storm doesn't do anything to the rental house I own.

Revised best night ever....

I know I said I had the best night ever last week, but last night topped it with whipped cream and a cherry or two.

I went out with Tall Boy, G, Harrison and Paul. We met at a bar, but they boys all felt conspicuous as the only black people there (there were actually two other black men, but apparently they weren't 'black enough' whatever that means.)

The short version is we ended up at a titty bar again, what a hell of a time. They have done wonders with Baby Dolls since it moved, don't you think?

Text messages with Paul after we left the club at 3 am:

me: damn
him: damn what
me: I wish it wasn't so late
him: its not SO late
me: 3:30 - thats late - its a shame too, still have on black boots (knee high) and black undies
him: oh my god
me: I guess 3:30 isn't SO late
him: I'm on my way

I met him at the door, he started to speak but I cut him off by saying "I think the arm of that couch looks good, don't you?"

Hol. e. cow.

He's my new best friend.

I have never met a man that talks as dirty as me - perhaps even dirtier.

I didn't even have to ask him to leave - he totally gets it.

So here I am at work having had 3 hours of sleep and I'm sore as hell. Ahhhhhh the price you pay for am little fun.

Here is my HNT submission, a very tired eye:

Nobody wants to fuck a sicko

I'm back sans snark.

This cold is kicking my ass.

I stayed home yesterday and watched Be Cool and Layer Cake. I liked them both, I must have been sick - that never happens. I shall blame it on copious amounts of NyQuil (oh how I love thee - sweet nectar that brings me sleep and fucked up dreams about sex with some random cops.) Anywho, go get Layer Cake- I think you will like it. Those crazy Brits.

I went over to EB's house last night. The man lives in a hovel. A hovel I say. He at least makes an effort to keep it clean, but his entire apartment could fit into my living/dining rooms. Poor thing. He still hasn't been invited to my house yet- I don't know why.

Still no sex. He asked, again, but I blamed my illness this time. Nobody wants to fuck a sicko, right? Wrong. Sick is the new well, and is very sexy apparently.

Cuban Boy called while I was there, he told me he was going to stop by my house in a little while. I let him know that I was not home and that I was curled up on a couch with another man - didn't we discuss this over the weekend? Fucking freaks.

EB was kind enough to watch Nip/Tuck with me. I love that show more than life itself. It is my only tv obsession. I need to get naked with Kimber.

That is all.

Send provisions (in the form of gifts from my wishlist on my profile.)

The weekend.

Things I did this weekend:

1) Stood up my dog's play date and his cute owner
2) Attended a bachelor party of a stranger
3) Turned down free Patron shots
4) Told Cuban Boy that he should leave me alone
5) Lied to EB and told him that I spent Sunday with my mom when in fact I spent it laying around my house

Things I didn't do:
1) Drink
2) Return Paul's calls
3) Answer my door

If I was EB I would have punched me in the stomach by now. I break our plans and tease him incessantly, yet he still calls me to say goodnight. Very interesting.

I've got nothing. I think I will go home sick.

Some quotes for you.

Nothing to share here - no items of note from last night.

Here are some random tidbits I have written down in my trusty notebook I carry in my purse- snippets from actual conversations I've had lately.

"I'll kill anything."

"You know muu-muus used to be sexy, I don't know what has happened to them."

"That car is so sexy I would fuck the tailpipe if they would let me."

"I'm better at being on top now."

"Apparently I'm really good at eating the pussy."

"My jeans now have a hole in the crotch, how did that happen?"

"Tigers drink beer."

"Skinny penis' are the worst - I hate them so much."

"Well I masturbate all the time."

"All of my slut slots are filled right now."

I said 3 of them.

Oh, and I just looked back and realised that I haven't had sex since August. It's almost like I'm married or something. Fixing that is on my 'to do' list for this weekend.

How could I forget?

When I arrived back at my apt last night from EB's at 10:30 I was met in the parking lot by Tall Boy (read fuck buddy neighbor who is out of rotation, and has been for more than a month) who had the following to say:

"Where in the hell have you been?"

Ummmmmm. Yeah. WTF?

We did NOT have plans, and last time I checked he was NOT paying my bills.

So I told him I had been out whoring. What else could I do?

Edit-

Lunchtime conversation with Derrek, the guy who lives 2 doors down with some woman (I swear we're not together) and like 4 kids, has gang tattoos from head to toe, and who I've never seen go to work:

D- I see you come home for lunch every day, I was wondering if you have some kind of male companion to take care of your needs?
Me- Ummmmm. It depends on what day of the week you ask me.
D- 'Cause it's a shame if you don't have somebody waiting here to have a nooner with.
Me- (blank stake)
D- I'm just sayin'
Me- Are you asking me if I am being fucked?
D- Yes. Because if you aren't...
Me- Are you kidding me? Derrek I am having enough sex for the both of us.
D- Oh, ok. Can I come in?
Me- No.

The best part of this is he is friends with Tall Boy, so as I was leaving they are standing outside together and Derrek yells out "Just give it some thought!" He has not been informed of the informal relationship Tall Boy and I have.

I hope Tall Boy beats him down. He could break him like a twig if he so desired.

My apartments are full of ghetto magical goodness.

Lame HNT Submission

Here is my lame HNT submission.

I am reaching for my toy box last night after once again rebuffing EB's advances.

Pixel- does this look familiar?

Check out the HNT button to the right for le rulz.....

(EB slipped up and said 'I love your smile' last night- I have never seen a man retract a statement so quickly!! 'Like- I mean like.' Apparently he knows me pretty well already.)

I did call Paul back, but declined to go since he said the bar was not busy. He was trying to get an invite over to the house, but I was good. Oh so good.

Really, why must I be so evil?

OK so tonight is the third night in a row that I have plans with EB. He has patiently been waiting for me to 'not be working late' so he can take me out. I have cancelled on him to go to a strip club on Monday with Paul and then to go to a bar with Pixel and Kat last night.

The plans are laid- the place has been picked and the time has been set.

Paul just called and really wants me to meet him and his friends at a bar I really like. I want to go.

I WANT TO GO.

But I won't.

Sigh.

EB had better be worth it (tiny dicks need not apply.) Have I mentioned how hot he is? Damn I am a freak.

Moldy

And here is a picture I took of my cat last night. This is a lame attempt to calm down my rage that was further fueled by the bag of MOLDY M&Ms I just got from the vending machine.

To hear my sex stories you must also suffer through my furbaby pictures.

Those are the breaks my friends.

Now praise my baby for the goddess she is.

Rant

Girls night out.

I am so tired.

No Pixel, I did not sleep with Tall Boy, I didn't even answer the door.

The comment about J (my ex) having a motorcycle pissed me off.

I got left holding the credit card debt, the huge mortgage and all of the pets- and he got a motorcycle? Very, very bad thoughts are running through my head right now.

Oh and look at that - 1 year ago last week he left.

He still doesn't deserve to be happy yet. I make that call and I say it's too soon.

Yes I am allowed to be petty.

Good fucking riddance.

I want to tell him about Miami (and North Carolina, and our bed) so very much.

But I won't.

(I bet y'all weren't ready for that.)

Perhaps I should focus on working on my festival scheduler for ACL huh? Who else is going and who are your 'must see's?'

Update- Apparently I misunderstood - he has had the motorcycle for a while, it seems as though he has wrecked it here in the last week. Well there is my silver lining. I always told him he would.

Oh shut up, I didn't wish death upon him or anything horrible like that. Herpes yes, death not so much. Please see the statement in my banner if you have any concerns.

A new stalker?

Somebody keeps calling my cell from 817-933-0041 and asks for me by name then breaths heavily into the phone and cackles.

When I call it back it says it is disconnected (even though I called it right back.)

What happens when you call it?

Fuckers.

Makes me wish I subscribed to one of those 'find out anything about anybody' services.

Best night ever.

Seriously. Best. Ever.

Outfit #1 won and boy did it ever do the trick.

The strippers were not the hottest I've ever seen, but what can you do, it was a Monday night.

Holy crap.

It ended up just being the two of us- all of his friends bailed. It didn't matter. So very much their loss. We sat there and watched football and drank beer and were surrounded by naked girls. Life is good.

Paul seemed suprised at how many offers I got to go home with the girls. Silly boy.

The phone conversation on the way home went something like this:

Me- Damn- I forgot to say thanks for tonight - I didn't mean for you to spend that much money and wanted you to know that I've got next time for sure

Him- Girl please - do not worry about it, I invited you out and it was not a problem at all. You are cool as hell and we can hang out any time you want.

Me- We should just go ahead and get the whole fucking thing out of the way soon.

Him- Oh good God- hey, whatever you say, yes we should. Wow.

Me- OK then, maybe later this week. Bye.

Him- Damn.

So Paul is my new drinking buddy. We have both agreed that we aren't in a 'dating' place - he knows about EB and I know that he has a kid.

Gotta love those no pressure relationship things.

Whew.

Your opinion please

So I'm debating with myself (yes it's spirited) over what to wear tonight.

We are going to a decidedly low class strip joint so the boys can prove to me that 'yes, you really can touch.'

The options:

1) The "I had to work late and didn't have time to change" look - black slacks, strappy black heals and the top that made that one girl say "I'm not a lesbian but your boobs are mesmerizing in that top." I'm thinking hair in a 1/2 french twist with lots of curlies coming out the top, and the closer- my sexy librarian glasses.

2) Tight baby tee that says 'where the wild things are' across my breasts and short denim skirt (very close to what I wore Saturday night,) hair in braids.

3) Silky babydoll shirt and jeans, straighten hair.

Thoughts?

Thanks for playing - bonus points for anybody who can figure out where I am going (think Harry Hines area) and shows up.

I'm not broken!!!!!!!

I figured out what the problem was and it is well on its way to being fixed. No more details at this time.

I had a wonderful weekend full of sleep, bad movies (oh so bad) a even a couple of dates (I know they were against the rules, but they helped!)

I spent Friday night completely alone - I didn't answer my phone, I went to sleep at an obscenely early hour and slept until an obscenely late hour. It was pure bliss.

Saturday was spent sitting in front of the tv watching the aforementioned bad movies (Closer and Constantine. Who in the world told Keanu that he could act? Seriously I want their address so I can kick their ass.)

I caved in on Saturday night and went over to EB's house for dinner and a movie (we never quite made it to the movie- the man reads - he is gorgeous and he READS!! We got caught up talking about books - *swoon*) He taught me how to country dance in the middle of his living room - I had to leave early lest I rip his clothes off and do something I was sure to regret.

When I left EB's house about 10 and wasn't quite ready to go home, so I hooked up with a guy we met last weekend - Paul - and his coworkers to watch the end of the UT game. We had a blast - Paul is super cute and is no nonsense about the whole dating thing like I am. His coworkers were so much fun- a very laid back crowd that was amused by my antics. All of his friends asked me out when he wasn't looking (because you men are dogs!)

Paul and I ended up getting a little more familiar with each other in the parking lot as he walked me to my car at the end of the night.

I felt a little bad when I got the following voice mail from EB as I was adjusting my disheveled self in the car after parting with Paul:

"Hey gorgeous - ummm - it's 2 am and I just wanted to know that I can't sleep because I can't stop thinking about you. I hope you are sleeping well."

I wanted to audio post it because it was so sweet, but that's not gonna happen because I am a technical idiot.

I managed to be alone all day Sunday and into the night. I didn’t return calls from Army Boy, Cuban Boy and Tall Boy.

Yea me!

So I feel well rested and ready to go now.

The normal me is back tonight – I am going to a strip club with Paul and his coworkers – I bet I will have some fun stories to share tomorrow!

I'm just kickin' puppies here..... nothing abnormal.

I'm a little bit shocked the whole world didn't shudder and shake at noon today.

I bought diapers for the first time in my life.

Diapers I tell you. And those wipey things. Lot's of them. I'm like a wipey thing goddess.

The Family Dollar by my work has Huggies on CLEARANCE. Clearance I tell you. I suppose since I have them lying around and all now I will give them to the shelter for those sweet little monsters who have no home. (Live in Dallas and want to know where? I can provide that information- just email me.)

Gag - I'm going to have to kick a puppy or something to redeem myself. (OK- we all know I won't kick a puppy, right? A man maybe, but never a puppy.)

Do what you can.

All is well

I got my Jeep back last night - all I needed was a new battery, so the damage to my bank account was minimal.

By the time I settled in on my couch for the night I had my bottle of champagne (only one Stair,) a fresh 20 pack of beer (I only had a few,) three new movies from Blockbuster and my six piece chicken nuggets. I was a very happy girl.

My phone only rang once last night, and it was actually somebody I was willing to talk to (Mom.)

All is well - I am feeling better already.

Perhaps I will even be back to somewhat entertaining by early next week. Who knows.

HNT

I forgot it was Thursday.

Here you go.

Here is my hair in all of its freakish curly glory. It's gotten so long I couldn't get it all in the picture. I looks even longer when it all straight and smooth.

Now taking donations for haircuts.

Sorry- no nipples for you today, you have been a bad girl/boy.

See Osbasso over there on the sidebar if you want to see some cool pics.

Thanks for playin'.

EDIT: My mom just called me, she bought almost $500 worth of school supplies and donated them to the relief effort. She's the coolest. You should all bow down to her.

Here's your proof

That somebody importatnt hates me.

Last night I'm trying to be good and do the alone thing and I went to dinner and had a little glass of beer and begin to head home.

I get out to my Jeep and there is no power - none at all.

I call my handy rescuce service and sit down on the curb to wait for them (see, I didn't even go back in and bitch about it at the bar.)

So I'm sitting there minding my own business when up walks Theology Boy. Remember him? Mr "things would be a lot easier if you did what I tell you"- does that ring a bell? He asks what's up and I tell him things are under control and he scoffed at me.

The man scoffed at me as I was sitting it my heals and skirt on the curb in a dark parking lot.

Whatever.

So the roadside assistance gets it started and I get home just as the lights are beginning to flicker- I coasted into a parking spot at my complex (thank goodness for that.)

I waited 2 hours for the tow truck this morning to take me to the dealership, and as I was getting out of said tow truck my heal got caught and I busted the hell out of my knee on the asphalt. Blood is sexy, no? I hope so.

And now I'm at work.

Sucks.

Where is my flask?

Bah.

Nothing to see here - move along now.

I will pay one of you to listen to the voice mails that await me from Cuban Boy and Army Boy.

Avoidance isn't a bad thing, right?

New shirt

I just ordered this.

Sometimes I feel like I am soley supporting this website - they should give me free stuff.
Go order something from www.tshirthell.com and tell them I sent you and I deserve free stuff.

Oh, and if you are easily offended then don't go there, but if that is the case then what the hell are you doing here?

I'm broken

OK so I have come to the conclusion that there is something wrong with me lately. I don't want to be touched - by anyone.

We had a fun little double date Saturday night- E finally hit the nail on the head with who my Electrician Boy (EB) looks like- ever hear of Lorenzo Lomas? Yea - that's him below. Dead ringer except that EB isn't freakshily tan.


So I've got this hot guy hanging all over me, but I then told him that I don't like to be touched. Pushing my limits, I also told him that I wasn't going to have sex with him - ever. What the hell?

He told me that was cool and that he could handle just being friends- he's a super sweet guy. E wants to call him our 'fun Bobby' (Friends reference.) He called me Sunday night to say he had a good time and can't wait to hang out again.

I'm such a bitch. There is nothing wrong with this man and he worships the ground I walk on and I don't want him to kiss me.

Gah.

Moving on- I also had a similar conversation with Cuban Boy yesterday.
CB- Can I kiss you?
Me- No- I don't want to be touched
CB- ever?
Me- ever.

This is the man who I had really great sex with last weekend. Really fucking amazing sex and I now want nothing to do with it.

We met a very attractive man at a bar after the date - Paul was his name - I moved his hand off of my thigh several times.

So yeah, I'm broken. I have never been very touchy feely, but this is out of control. Since when do I not want hot men to touch me?

The conclusion that I have come to is that I need to spend this next week pretty much alone, and the weekend too. Perhaps I haven't had enough me time?

Thoughts? Advise?

8 Lies and a Truth

Ever play that game/icebreaker 3 Truths and a Lie? Perhaps it's a corporate thing.

Here are the lies and a truth that I told Army Boy last night to let him know that I was not interested:

1. I smoke -because I remember him saying that he hated it I stopped off at the store and bought a pack (I smoked one and almost vomited)
2. I can't stand to be touched (he had to be reminded thrice)
3. I can't turn my phone off because I am waiting on a call (he asked what the call was about, how friggin' rude, I refused to answer. My phone rang 7 times during our time together)
4. I deal coke on the side to make ends meet (I really thought this would throw him off since he is currently in law enforcement)
5. I do coke every weekend, in addition to dealing it, and the phone call I'm waiting for is my connection. Oh, and by the way I'm on it right now, you want some?
6. Cuban Boy is my connection and I have sex with him for drugs (seriously, I actually said that line at one point)
7. I am not looking for someone to date, or any new friends, or a fuck buddy at the moment. I said "All of my slots are filled"
8. In addition to Luis I also fuck his buddy Matt for drugs occasionally
9. I have cheated in every relationship I have ever had (because he told me once that he had/would never cheat)

Lies, lies, lies!!!!


I know there were more but you would THINK that these would be enough to make him run screaming. NOPE. He waned to know if I would go out with him this weekend. He called three times after we parted - one message said that he just got home and was getting into bed and wished it was my bed instead.

WTF?

Perhaps the best part of the night was the fact that E and Cort showed up and sat at the table directly behind him. I was subjected to boobie flashes and thrown chips while trying to keep a straight face. Please remember that these two lovely ladies were with me when I met him - I think he wondered where he knew them from all night.

From what I hear he turned around and hit on Cort when E and I went to the restroom - he told her that I was a drug dealer and he wasn't sure how to handle that!!!!!!!

At one point I wondered if I could stab myself in the neck with the stem of one of the long stem roses he gave me (you know I vomited a little in my mouth when I saw them, right?)

He tried to kiss me at my car- he ended up hitting my hairline as I whipped my head around in horror.

So that's how the evening went - the wilder the story the more he seemed in to me. Fucking freak. He also busted out the "I have had emotional issues in the past" line - no crap? Really? You think?

And this my friends is going to send me to the nunnery.

Right after this long weekend of course.

Date night - yea me.

The date with Army boy is looming over me like a used car salesman over a busty single woman on a hot day (I just couldn't come up with anything clever- sorry.)

I am quivering in my under-roos. OK- so I don't have under-roos but boy if they made 'em in my size I would be all over them. Easily distracted - me??? Never!!

We are meeting at 7:30 in a city that is a nice halfway point (we live at least 30 minutes away from each other.) The site - a well lit Mexican restaurant. The plan - load up on free booze (top shelf of course) and then dump his ass on the way to the door. The goal- not to be hacked into a million pieces and fed to the seagulls.

A lofty goal I know...

So Pixel is mulling over the idea of us getting naked to raise money for the relief effort. None of this one nipple crap- I think she's serious. Are you E/Pixel?

Do any of you have any thoughts on the subject???

OK Y'all (NSFW)

So here we are.... we meet again.

Let me set this up a little.

If you stopped by last week (which I'm sure you did) you saw a pic of my breasts and some other girls hand.

This weeks submission was taken around the same time, in the same bed - my bed, the bed of many sins.

What you are about to see is HER nipple and my tongue (the blue shiny thing in the middle is my tongue ring as pictured in an earlier HNT submission. It's raw, it's gritty, but it's naked and we were naked and that's what counts.

Why, oh why am I doing this? Because Osbasso said so, that's why.

So here you go.